Sunday, 23 January 2011

What's TBone Drinking?

Rum and coke.

SOMEBODY is a bad influence.

Ice Fishing

My brother invited me up to Lake Simcoe for some ice fishing with him and his buddy Chris.  The 4 a.m. start time didn't really excite me but a chance to rip around a frozen lake on my newly revived ride did.


And the sledding was great.  I tore that lake UP!  Found a really wide, twisting river on one end and I was giggling for an hour straight as I played GP racer on my sled.  What a rush.

But I was also there to do some fishing.  And my brother's buddy Chris knows how to do ice fishing right.  Portable shelter, motorized ice auger, ceramic heater, fish finder, aerated minnow bucket, and a positive mental attitude.


All three of us fit in that thing comfortably and it was a good morning on the lake.  Not a constant stream of fish but the waves of plenty more than made up for the lulls.  The only thing I could complain about was that my boots weren't exactly up to the task of a -20 day.  I'll have to upgrade before I ever go back up but I will definitely be up for doing it again.

Jenny and Me

Our song...

Thanks to Jody for the link!

Saturday, 22 January 2011

Southern Ontario Sledding


Took the sled out for its first real run on some trails today.  Finally got all my papers in order, ownership, registration sticker, trail permit, and insurance.  All good to go.  Now lets see what these trails are like in Southern Ontario!

And I gotta say, it's pretty impressive what they have in place down here.  Yah, you're running over the occasional corn stalk but you can spend all day booting around on groomed trails.  It's not the same as tearing up a trail through the woods of Northern Ontario or ripping through some powder on a frozen lake but it's way more than I was expecting in this part of the province.

So I was pleased with my day of sledding.  I got back to my car, where I'd parked in a little lot near the trails, loaded up the sled on the trailer, and attempted to back out into the street.  I thought I was doing a pretty good job.  I felt the trailer starting to slide into the ditch so I slipped it into drive and proceeded to take off across the shoulder at the side of the road.  Except it wasn't a shoulder, it was snow that had filled in the ditch.  Dived nose first into the ditch at quite the hilarious angle.  Reverse wasn't doing anything.  Scrambled out and made the call to my brother to come rescue me.

As I was wrestling with the trailer hitch to try and get it free from the car, a guy in a retardedly huge truck pulled up and offered to yank me out with his winch.  Yes, please.  Even with all his ballast, pulling out the CeR-Vix still skidded his truck a fair bit.  I doubt my brother's SUV would have had much of a chance in helping so I am ridiculously grateful to this guy for stopping to help out.  I know I say a lot of mean things about people in general here but man it's nice to meet the good ones.

Off to Lake Simcoe tomorrow.  See how fast I can really get going on this thing.


What's TBone Drinking?

Rum Screwdrivers!

Yes it's just like a regular screwdriver but with rum instead of vodka.  Seem to have more rum than usual in the house lately.  Yup.

Friday, 21 January 2011


I was seriously considering shuttering this site.  Didn't seem to be much point anymore.  Being giddy 24 hours a day doesn't leave much room for wry, sarcastic commentary on those things that used to cause me such rage.  But Jen made me promise I'd keep writing.  She says she didn't want to be blamed for the site getting closed but I think she just wanted me to stop gawking at her for a few minutes a day.  Anyways, turns out I just needed the right day to come along for all the rage to come back.

So, who would I like to punch in the face this week?

My high school guidance counselor.

Those alumni of Manitouwadge High School will no doubt find this a perfectly acceptable face to punch.  But, today, I especially would like to plant my fist in that smug mug for the mere reason of suggesting I choose engineering as a career path after high school.  You fucking cunt.  You set me up for a lifetime of getting kicked in the balls.  You sick fuck.

He's obviously not entirely to blame.  I do have free will.  I had supportive parents who would have been happy with any career choice I made at the time.  But I'm not about to go punching myself in the face so I'm afraid that Q-Tip looking little shit will have to take the brunt of the punishment.

But why am I so down on engineering today?  Well, I admit I started the day fairly grumpy knowing my best drinking buddy was heading back to Niagara today.  But now imagine the sheer clusterfuckery of being in a meeting one week and being told that the number one priority is an ongoing production issue, then developing and successfully testing a solution, pausing for two hours of absolutely useless 5S training, then being strong armed into one change to your solution to appease the money grubbing management, having that change cause a complete shit storm on the production line, and then wrapping up the week with another meeting with the same fuck knobs from the week before who have decided to ream your ass for now being a week behind on the new product development schedule you set aside to work on the production issue.  FUCK!  Now all that has happened and consider how you would respond to an individual who then suggests you wouldn't be behind if you had been using Microsoft fucking Project!  Holy mother of baby Jesus.  TBone's swinging for the fences and the pin head who set him on this path is all tee'd up.

But as absolutely soul-draining as today was, I still grinned from ear to ear to come home and find a thoroughly processed kitchen.  Everything so neatly organized.  Sigh.  Rage passes.  But I'd still like to pop that pint-sized prick right in the face.

An Evening With Jen and TBone


Tuesday, 11 January 2011


So, no point in dancing around this anymore, Jen and I decided last night that we're officially "a couple".  Yup, there you go.  We've known each other for a couple years.  She's been my guardian angel at my drunkest, we've been to hockey games, football games, concerts, and even carved pumpkins together.  And through it all, I'd kept my distance, not thinking she'd be interested in a degenerate like me.  Plus she's my friend's little sister, so that all added up to "hands off".

But certain friends weren't satisfied with that and I got a well deserved kick in the arse which led to my shameful actions at the Allenses Christmas party.  Things turned around quick after that and so here we are.  We're the same in ways that make it so comfortable to be around her and different in ways that make every second exciting.  She's already seen me at my brain-meltingly worst and is still here hanging out with me.  We're both disgruntled that our friends would meddle with our personal lives but, at the same time, extremely grateful for the push.  Thanks guys!

So, we're starting out down this new path and everything is butterflies and rainbows.  There'll be challenges for sure: coordinating schedules, living in different cities, finding something we both want to watch on Netflix.  But those things seem pretty small right now.

And for those worried about the future tone of this blog, well, I can't promise there won't be more posts like this but I have faith that future Tim Horton's commercials will continue to enrage me and, as long as I'm an engineer, job satisfaction is certain to elude me.  I'll just have to focus that much harder on getting that rage down in print before thoughts of Jen force them out of my head.

Good times.

Tuesday, 4 January 2011


Imagine yourself starting a new job.   Your boss comes in and places a big pile of shit on your desk.  Turns out this big pile of shit is now your responsibility.  The person who created this big pile of shit has moved on and somebody needs to look after it.

After a while, calls start to come in.  People aren't happy with your big pile of shit.  Why is the big pile of shit so smelly?  Why does the big pile of shit fall apart in the rain?  Why are cracks forming in the big pile of shit?

You try and come up with a way to make the big pile of shit more appealing.  A water-proof coating, some pot-pourri spread on the surface, and binding agents stirred into the mix.  Things are better but calls keep coming in.  At its heart the big pile of shit is still just a big pile of shit.  You can only pretty it up so much before you finally decide to flush it and start over with something entirely new.

But something new takes time and the calls continue during that time.  And now management is involved.  Questioning how you've made such a mess of the big pile of shit.  The big pile of shit was perfect when they pushed it into production without enough testing.  And now you've come along and fucked it all up.

Imagine that scenario.  Now ask me how my day went.

Shitty, thanks for asking.

Saturday, 1 January 2011


Whooo! Happy New Year!  This is my second time writing this post from my phone due to an app failure so let's hit the main points before getting to this year's resolution:

- I am sick
- I am not as sick as Jen
- Absinthe may be a suitable substitute for lighter fluid but it should never be ingested
- pictionary is a stupid game
- taboo! is very similarly a stupid game that seems specifically designed to generate hostility and distrust amongst players

And that brings us to TBone's New Year's Resolution : 2011 Edition.  I was quite pleased with how the 2010 resolution was accomplished well ahead of schedule.  I'm hoping that momentum of accomplishment will carry through to 2011.

So my 2011 New Year's Resolution is: Don't fuck this up.

Things have been rolling along pretty good lately but I've been known to self-destruct.  So I've set myself a Specific, Measureable, Actual, Realistic, Time-based goal for 2011 of not fucking this up. It will be challenging but I think it's very achievable.  Right after another nap.

Happy New Year everybody!